Oh Woe Is Me

Last night was really tough on mom. Her pain was so different. I thought maybe she was having withdrawals from all the morphine and oxy she’s been on since last week, but my Aunt, a 48 year veteran in nursing, told me it’s most likely not that since she’s on other medications in the same family. The only other way to explain her pain last night and also a little bit this morning, is severe anxiety about moving to rehab.

Bless her heart. She had such an awful experience at a nursing home for rehab the last time this happened, I think in the back of her mind she’s remembering, and it’s causing her anxiety where she experiences pain over her entire body, she’s nauseated, goes from hot to cold in minutes, says she can’t breathe and yet her 02 stays between 98/99. Any time anyone mentions rehab, she begins these symptoms within a couple of minutes.

I did get a smile out of her this morning.

I thought it might help to talk it out with her, where she’s going, what to expect as far as rehab and she settled down a bit and began to relax. She was falling asleep when I left.

I stopped at her house and grabbed some papers I need for the rehab facility and then stopped for lunch at Big Red’s Cafe for lunch.

Before I took the first bite I had a little melt down and cried out my woes to the Lord and to Bruce in text. Both of them brought comfort in their words. Bruce assuring me it’s going to be all right and God reminding me of the Psalmist’s words in Psalm 46, “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”

I’m so thankful for my husband. And I’m thankful for my God.